May 5, 2008


After the "father thingy" incident...i try to regain my serius saja...anyway Last Sunday i was supposed to hang out with Amal, i didn't sleep the night before, had a bad headache again and then slept on and off all day long. i called her right before she was supposed to leave and told her that i felt like poop. i felt like crap about it because i was really excited to hang out with her and have some fiber fun (you fiber geeks know what i mean...flashing the stash, letting people turn the cranks, spin your wheels, etc, etc) and then i felt guilty, like maybe i should have tried to push through feeling poopy. yeah, well, that didn't last because i fell asleep and didn't wake up until that evening. i was sick again last night, wanted to take a shower in the wee hours but i was so nauseous and dizzy that i was afraid that i would fall down (go boom) and Betty sleeps through almost anything, so it would be a bad thing. after a bit of sitting with my head in the "John", i decided i should try to just lie down in bed. i woke up late today, poor Betty was attempting to fix the Mazda and spent the whole day on it, and it ended up not being what she thought it would be, so i felt bad about that. She apologized to me for not being around, but i was sleeping all day. i literally didn't do ANYTHING. didn't talk on the phone, go online, do stuff, nothing. i didn't even eat, except for when i first woke up. crazy. and this is how it is almost everyday lately. i feel useless. and i have a bad headache as we speak. it is hard to deal with being in bed all day when i feel just as shitty if i do or don't. i guess i could make myself sick enough to not be able to even get up and shower, but man, it frustrates me. i guess it is good that i didn't plan on going to Thye's Restaurant this weekend, as much as i wanted to, i didn't have the cash to blow and i wouldn't have been up to it. plus, i would end up not getting to all of the different get-togethers and hangouts with all of my peeps, so what is the point? sigh. i am trying to be positive, but man, it gets hard when you feel like the kid who breaks both of their legs right before the holiday started. I cannot take picture of me sleeping but picture above will do because they have been sleeping with me the whole day haha!

not much else because...i have been sleeping.